Rumsan Blog

A Giant Downfall

Saturday, 26 September 2009 12:48 by santosh

 Sep 25 2009

 

WaMu

People walk past Washington Mutual Inc.'s Seattle headquarters September 16, 2008, nine days before the bank went down in the biggest failure in U.S. history. 

Late in the afternoon of September 25, 2008, the phone rang in Steve Rotella’s 33rd floor office in downtown Seattle.

The wide bay windows, once part of a conference room, commanded a sweeping view of Puget Sound, befitting the president of the nation’s largest savings and loan.

On a credenza behind his desk, one of his computer monitors quietly streamed ticker symbols.

Washington Mutual’s closing price: $1.69, down 25 percent.

For the past few days, a handful of big financial institutions had been poring over WaMu’s books, trying to decide whether to make a bid and rescue it from potential failure.

Suddenly, they had stopped.

Rotella wanted to know why. He had asked WaMu’s head of regulatory relations, John Robinson, to see what he could learn from the bank’s chief regulator, the federal Office of Thrift Supervision.

Now, Robinson was calling back. “Steve, it’s over,” Robinson said, according to people familiar with the call. “They’re coming in to close us this afternoon.”

Shortly after Rotella hung up the phone, government officials strode through the marble lobby of the newly built WaMu Center and ended the 119-year life of a vast financial enterprise once considered among the strongest and most promising in the country.

Within two hours of the call, regulators took control of a company with $307 billion in assets and sold it to rivalJPMorgan Chase & Co. for $1.9 billion, a fraction of what the New York powerhouse led by Jamie Dimon had offered just months earlier.

With these swift actions, tens of thousands of shareholders and bondholders lost billions of dollars, and Washington Mutual became known as the largest bank failure in U.S. history — nearly eight times larger than the Federal Deposit Inurance Corp.’s previous record failure, set during the savings and loan crisis of the 1980s.

Yet despite the size and significance of this event, much of what happened to WaMu has never been reported.

“It was dealt with so surgically and so quickly that in comparison to all of the other things going on, I think this one almost became a non-issue,” said Lewis Mandell, a professor of business and finance economics at theUniversity of Washington’s Foster School of Business.

To recreate WaMu’s final days, the Puget Sound Business Journal examined hundreds of pages of documents obtained through the Freedom of Information Act and interviewed dozens of former WaMu executives and employees, as well as government regulators and outside observers. Many sources would only speak on condition of anonymity. These sources, including insiders who lived through WaMu’s downfall, paint a picture of panic, confusion and futility as events spiraled out of control.

These interviews show that WaMu suffered through not one but two bank runs in its final months. The first run was many times larger than the run that felled California lender IndyMac in July 2008, though neither shareholders nor the public knew about it. WaMu survived that run, and the second run was tapering off when regulators moved in and shut the bank, citing the run as the reason.

In addition, WaMu’s top executives, led by CEO Alan Fishman, were trying to sell the bank after federal regulators imposed a deadline, only to discover that they were being undermined by those same regulators, executives say. The government’s plan to seize the bank, if it became known beforehand, would cause potential buyers to immediately cool their heels, because buying after a government takeover would be a lot cheaper than even the desperate private purchase deal that Fishman was seeking.

The takeover of WaMu prevented a potentially catastrophic hit to the deposit insurance fund. In that sense the seizure was a success: Not a dime of the FDIC’s then $45 billion fund went to reimburse WaMu depositors because JPMorgan Chase had taken over.

Yet even a year later, fundamental questions remain unanswered. And in part because regulators have said so little about their actions, there remains a voracious appetite to get to the bottom of why WaMu failed.

A slew of inquiries is under way. The Federal Bureau of Investigation and the U.S. Attorney’s Office in Seattle launched a large-scale investigation last October that is ongoing. The bankrupt holding company was recently given permission to subpoena hundreds of pages of documents from JPMorgan as part of its discovery process. The purpose of that investigation, which could take months, is to shed light on JPMorgan’s actions in the weeks leading up to its purchase of the bank, according to a spokesman for WaMu’s holding company.

Recently, the Inspector General’s office at the U.S. Treasury, the department that houses the Office of Thrift Supervision, launched a “post mortem” investigation jointly with the FDIC’s inspector general, “to see if there was anything that could have been done” to save WaMu, said Rich Delmar, counsel to the Treasury department.

“The IG offices typically don’t investigate cases where there was no cost to the insurance fund,” Delmar added. “But because this was so damn big, we’re doing it anyway.” The results are expected as early as next month.

The First Panic

In early July 2008, hundreds of people lined up outside the headquarters of IndyMac Bank in Pasadena, Calif. News reports had made clear that IndyMac had a large exposure to troubled subprime loans. Fearing the bank was on the verge of failure, customers were pulling out their money. The line stretched down the block. That image, which appeared on newspaper front pages and TV stations nationwide, depicted the first major bank run since the savings-and-loan crisis in the 1980s.

Two blocks away, managers at a large, white-columned WaMu branch watched the commotion. Soon, their own customers began asking, “Is my money safe?”

On the evening of Friday, July 11, just after the FDIC seized IndyMac, a top WaMu retail bank executive in Seattle sent an email to other retail bank executives across the company with a simple question: “IndyMac has failed—How are we going to respond?”

Through a flurry of sometimes heated emails, managers across WaMu’s network of 2,239 branches worked out a rough plan. WaMu’s deposit team would forecast the potential size of a run, based on daily data about cash outflows. Branch managers would try to reassure anxious customers. Tellers, who usually just cashed checks and dispensed rolls of quarters, now would recite details to show WaMu had more than enough money to meet regulatory minimums.

“We had tellers who knew our capital ratios and our liquidity ratios,” said George Kaye, who managed more than 200 WaMu branches in Southern California. “We were educating everyone.”

Despite these efforts, WaMu suffered a $9.4 billion run—seven times bigger than IndyMac’s. Southern California became the epicenter, although customers all around the country pulled out cash. Unlike IndyMac, however, WaMu executives kept the five-alarm fire under wraps. No lines formed down the block. No TV cameras splashed the news. Shareholders never knew, either. This first run happened after the start of the third quarter, and WaMu collapsed three business days before the quarter ended, following the second bank run. It never reported those financial results.

The Moody’s Meeting

At the end of August, Rotella and WaMu Treasurer Robert Williams boarded a leased private jet in Seattle and flew to meet with Moody’s Investors Service in New York. Typically, WaMu executives met with Moody’s senior credit officer, Craig Emrick. This time, however, the powerful rating agency greeted the WaMu executives with a team of people, an ominous sign.

“We don’t know exactly why that was,” said Peter Freilinger, WaMu’s assistant treasurer who flew out separately to attend the meeting. “Moody’s might have felt that the action was so important that they wanted everyone to hear the facts before they did anything.”

The bank run had calmed in August. To entice customers to make deposits, WaMu offered a special certificate of deposit paying 5 percent interest—extremely high at the time. It worked, and new money flowed in. But now, at Moody’s, WaMu executives had to face another challenge: the repercussions of the bank’s foray into risky mortgage lending.

Under former CEO Kerry Killinger, WaMu had written subprime and option-ARM loans to hundreds of thousands of home buyers with shaky credit, particularly in California. The loans generated healthy fees, and the bank could offload the risk by selling them to firms that turned them into mortgage-backed securities. But when the market for those securities crashed along with the housing market in mid-2007 and borrowers were foreclosed on, WaMu and other banks were left holding large numbers of bad loans. WaMu all but stopped writing these sorts of loans in late 2007, but it was too late. At the end of June 2008, there were still $69 billion of them on WaMu’s books—58 percent of all its home loans.

At Moody’s office, a few steps from Ground Zero, Rotella and other WaMu executives squared off across a conference table from the rating agency’s team. Led by Emrick, the analysts fired questions for an hour and a half, Freilinger said. Is the high-priced CD really bringing in stable customers? Does WaMu have any further strategy to bring in deposits? How is the bank dealing with its ailing mortgages and home equity lines of credit?

Rotella, who usually sent lower-level exectives to these meetings, tried to convince the analysts that WaMu had sufficent capital and deposits, despite the July bank run. Helped by a $7.2 billion private equity infusion in the spring of 2008, WaMu was easily in the range of a “well-capitalized” institution, by regulatory standards. Still, its recent second-quarter loss totaled $3.3 billion and it had just set aside $5.9 billion to cover bad loans.

The stakes of the meeting were high. A Moody’s downgrade would tag WaMu as a poor credit risk, making it difficult for the bank to borrow funds and further eroding public confidence. Moody’s declined to comment on the meeting.

Moody’s wouldn’t make a decision for several days. But the analysts asked pointed questions and didn’t joke. They sat with arms crossed and faces sternly set. WaMu executives left feeling they had failed to convince the agency of the bank’s health.

The Next Dominoes

On Sunday, September 7, Washington Mutual’s board ousted Killinger, who had served as CEO for 18 years, and named a New York banker, Alan Fishman, to succeed him. The announcement came two months after the board stripped Killinger of his chairman title and amid vocal shareholder unrest at WaMu’s plunging share price. Many thought the move came too late.

The next day, Fishman flew to Seattle to rally management, according to several former WaMu executives. According to one executive, Fishman came on board with the intent of “evaluating the team and evaluating the strategy.” But he soon learned that WaMu might be past the point of saving itself, according to executives who were there at the time.

In addition, within days the FDIC gave him a deadline: Find a buyer for the ailing bank by September 30, the end of the third quarter, according to a high-level executive familiar with the FDIC’s actions. Fishman and several other WaMu executives quickly flew to New York City to begin trying to sell WaMu.

On September 11, Moody’s issued its rating: It downgraded WaMu’s debt to junk status, rated the company’s financial strength at D+ and issued a negative outlook on the company, citing its asset quality and the potential for future losses. Freilinger, WaMu’s assistant treasurer, fielded the call from Emrick, and had the thankless task of checking the accuracy of Moody’s forthcoming press release. Freilinger’s heart sank. “No bank of our size anywhere in the world survives without an investment grade rating,” he recently said.

The downgrade roared across the country. WaMu customers, reminded once again that their money might not be safe, pulled $600 million out of WaMu that day. “That’s when we thought, ‘Oh, crap, here we go again,’” said one WaMu manager who monitored deposits.

Soon, other rating agencies followed suit, sparking another massive bank run that would ultimately become the reason FDIC officials gave for closing WaMu.

In the next three days, customers pulled another $2.3 billion out of WaMu. On Tuesday, September 16, Fishman, the bank’s new chief executive, flew from New York City to Washington, D.C. He had a morning meeting with OTS Director John Reich, WaMu’s chief regulator, and OTS deputy director Scott Polakoff.

Fishman Meets Bair

Fishman wanted to brief the regulators on WaMu’s efforts to find a buyer and to give an update on the bank’s liquidity position, according to people familiar with the meetings. By then, WaMu’s regulators were watching the bank more closely than they ever had before, and were receiving deposit reports daily—sometimes several times a day. That day, customers pulled out another $2.4 billion.

At the meeting, Fishman said he had approached Wells Fargo, JPMorgan Chase and Citigroup, according to several high-level WaMu executives. All three banks declined comment for this story.

“We’d been talking to a number of banks, some had kind of fallen off the plate and some were still plausible as potential acquirees, but it was going to require some time,” one high-level executive told the Business Journal.

Reich and Polakoff encouraged WaMu executives to keep pursuing potential suitors as well as follow up on efforts to raise more capital, according to executives familiar with the meeting.

After the meeting ended, Fishman and John Robinson, in charge of WaMu’s regulatory relations, walked the block and a half to the FDIC’s headquarters, near the White House, for a brief meeting with FDIC Chairman Sheila Bair. Bair doesn’t typically get involved in the details of bank closures, said David Barr, a spokesman for the FDIC. But, “a Washington Mutual doesn’t come around but once every 75 years.”

For his part, Fishman wanted to find out more about the September 30 sale deadline the FDIC had imposed several days earlier: What would happen if WaMu failed to find a buyer or raise additional capital by that time?

Bair told Fishman and Robinson that if WaMu was unable to sell the bank by the end of September it would be placed on the FDIC’s list of “troubled banks,” according to people familiar with the meeting. The list is like a scarlet letter: While it leaves out a financial institution’s name, WaMu’s asset size would clearly identify it in the financial community. The placement would damage the bank’s reputation far more than even rating-agency downgrades or the persistent news reports, according to several people familiar with the meeting. The list was scheduled to come out in less than a month.

The message to WaMu executives in that half-hour meeting was clear: Sell the bank, and fast.

“If WaMu had gone on the list, it would have been obvious to everybody that WaMu was being characterized as a troubled bank and that could have precipitated an additional run on the bank,” said one high-level executive familiar with the meeting.

Bair also told Fishman another intriguing piece of information: She said more than one bank had called the FDIC to ask whether there would be an opportunity to buy WaMu as a distressed asset, according to people familiar with the meeting. In other words, was the government planning to seize and sell the bank? If so, potential buyers would rather wait, for the price was sure to be lower in a government sale.

Bair said she had directed those banks to contact Fishman. The executives left the meeting believing the FDIC was indeed helping WaMu find a buyer. Yet in less than a week, regulators would seize the bank and sell it for less than a quarter of the $8 billion that JPMorgan Chase had previously offered.

What Bair might have said to the banks remains unclear, and is likely to be a focus of at least some of the ongoing investigations. Bair declined repeated requests to be interviewed about her role and decisions. The FDIC released Bair’s emails regarding WaMu. They were almost completely redacted.

Within days, JPMorgan Chase, Wells Fargo and Citibank stopped poring over WaMu’s books.

The Final Run

Back in Seattle, WaMu’s deposit team and liquidity managers watched as billions flew out of the bank, from all areas of the country. They estimated that the FDIC insurance covered more than half of the money that fled. It didn’t matter. Like the Great Depression, customers acted purely out of fear. In contrast, most of the money withdrawn during the July bank run lacked FDIC coverage, because it exceeded the $100,000 limit at the time.

A year later, it’s easy to forget how deeply panic gripped the country in the first three weeks of September. The government placed giant mortgage holders Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac into conservatorship. Investment bank Lehman Bros. filed for bankruptcy after the government refused to bail it out. The Federal Reserve gave insurerAmerican International Group (AIG) an $85 billion loan to stave off a collapse that could have frozen financial markets. Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson got down on one knee before House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, begging her not to blow up a $700 billion bailout deal.

“I think some people were taking their money and putting it under their mattress,” said Kaye, the WaMu California branch manager.

A longtime customer in Orange County brought a cake to her branch that spelled out in frosting, “We love you WaMu,” and then closed her account. Another customer at a branch in Southern California withdrew all her money and then, feeling guilty, returned the next day with a freshly baked peach cobbler for the branch’s staff, according to a former WaMu manager. Her money, however, stayed away.

Each day, Brinks Security trucks pulled up to replenish WaMu ATMs across the country. Before the crisis, the trucks delivered about $30 million in cash a day nationwide, Freilinger said. During the September bank run, they delivered as much as $250 million a day.

At WaMu’s Seattle headquarters, employees started compiling deposit reports as early as 6 a.m. with information from the East Coast. The reports moved up the ranks to WaMu’s executive team, including Rotella and Fishman. Executives and regulators held a conference call each afternoon, summing up the day’s news. Freilinger, who orchestrated the calls, avoided taking them in WaMu’s plastic-walled “villa” office cubicles, which echoed like shower stalls, because he feared the bank’s problems might be overheard. Unlike the July bank run, this time news trucks camped outside WaMu’s headquarters.

On September 18, Fishman sought to reassure customers. In a carefully worded letter distributed through bank branches, he said “WaMu has the capital, the liquidity and the business plan to serve your needs and protect your money through these challenging times.” He didn’t say that he was still trying to find a buyer to shore up the bank.

Eerie Silence

That day, WaMu lost $2.8 billion—the biggest one-day outflow in its history.

On Tuesday, September 23, a quiet descended on the bank. The run had slowed, but so had interest from potential buyers. Two weeks of shopping the bank across the East Coast produced no takers. Now, banks that had been combing through WaMu’s electronic data room as part of their due dilligence abruptly stopped.

“Suddenly, all the bidders appeared to lose steam all at once,” said a person familiar with the matter.

WaMu executives began to suspect that the FDIC was letting potential bidders know that the bank might soon be sold in a distressed sale. It’s not clear when the FDIC started approaching other banks, but WaMu executives say such a move would have undercut Fishman’s ability to sell the bank. It also appears to conflict with what insiders say Bair had told Fishman only days before — that she was referring potential bidders to him.

“Deep into the process, we learned that concurrent to management shopping the bank, that apparently the FDIC was soliciting bids,” said a person familiar with the matter. “I would say it came as a big surprise.”

To be sure, the FDIC would approach potential buyers of any troubled bank in advance to see if they had any interest and enough capital for a purchase, said a former regulator familiar with WaMu’s closure. Regulators from both the OTS and the FDIC have declined to be interviewed for this story.

“Once it was clear there would be a failure, there would certainly be a real push to find out who was a prospective buyer,” said the official, speaking on condition of anonymity.

But the difference in the two scenarios is substantial. In a private sale, shareholders would receive cash or stock for their holdings, which were worth about $7 billion when Fishman took over in early September. Under the seizure, they got nothing. Thus in theory, at least, the government’s action wiped out $7 billion in shareholder wealth.

What’s unknown: when the FDIC started shopping around the bank.

The Seizure

On the morning of September 25, Rotella had had enough. From New York, Fishman reported that potential buyers had stopped talking. Rotella called Robinson, the regulatory liaison, who was in San Francisco for a meeting. He asked Robinson to call his contacts at the OTS and the FDIC to find out what, if anything, was going on. The deadline for finding a buyer, set for September 30, was fast approaching, and since the regulators were following the situation almost hour by hour, they were sure to know.

Fishman, along with WaMu’s Chief Financial Officer Tom Casey, got on a plane from New York to fly back to Seattle. As the jet soared across the country, Robinson heard from Polakoff, the deputy director of the OTS, in Washington, D.C. It was about 4 p.m. Pacific Time.

“We’ll be in to close the bank this afternoon,” Polakoff told Robinson, according to sources familiar with the call.

An emergency board meeting was scheduled for 5 p.m.

Robinson called Rotella to tell him the news. Shortly after the call, at 6 p.m., several members of the FDIC and the OTS walked into WaMu’s stately lobby, built just two years earlier. Colorful posters bearing WaMu’s well-known “Whoo-hoo!” ad campaign decorated the windows.

Officials escorted the regulators past the giant “W” etched into the front lobby wall to the elevator bank and up to the 32nd floor, where several directors waited, seated around the boardroom table for the last time.

An OTS official presented several documents indicating the government’s ownership of WaMu’s two bank subsidiaries. The government immediately sold the assets to JPMorgan, leaving an empty WaMu holding company.

“At that point, it was out of our hands,” said one WaMu executive. “We were told by the regulators that JPMorgan would be in the next day.”

WaMu didn’t have time to tell its 43,000 employees. At the moment regulators strode through the lobby, officials in D.C. issued a press release announcing the seizure and sale. Employees heard about it on car radios and from friends calling their cell phones. Many heard rumblings around 4:30 p.m., when news reports from the East Coast carried rumors of the sale.

“I was standing outside my pod, talking to somebody and we were kind of going over tomorrow’s game plan,” said one WaMu manager. “And then the guy sitting next to me hollered out, ‘Holy shit, the Wall Street Journal is reporting we got sold to JPM.’”

Kaye, the regional manager of Southern California branches, was holding a “customer engagement” training session at WaMu’s Irvine administrative office, teaching managers how to greet and welcome new WaMu customers. He found out about the closure after reading an email from a higher-level manager.

“You get kind of surprised like, ‘Why didn’t they tell us?’” he said. “But nobody could have told us because nobody knew.”

Freilinger, away at a bonds conference in Paris, said he phoned and asked one of his deputies at WaMu headquarters to go buy beer and popcorn for the whole team after news of the seizure was announced.

The Pyramid ale bottles were promptly seized by FDIC officials when the staffer tried to re-enter WaMu headquarters. That night, the employees listened as Jamie Dimon, chief executive of JPMorgan Chase, formally announced the transaction.

They no longer worked for WaMu.

Source: http://www.portfolio.com/industry-news/banking-finance/2009/09/25/washington-mutual-downfall-anniversary/ 

 

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Namibian Seal Clubbing

Friday, 18 September 2009 06:29 by santosh

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Krishna Gone Missing

Wednesday, 16 September 2009 08:22 by santosh

A Nepalese woman’s 53 hours lost on the streets of Queens.


Krishna, on Queens Boulevard.  
(Photo: Jeff Riedel)

 The park should have been right there. A long set of stairs, leading through a children’s playground to a track where Krishna Gurung was planning to jog. She was running every day now, trying to lose the twenty pounds she had gained since coming to New York from Nepal. She looked around in frustration. It was seven o’clock on a Friday morning and raining again, as it had been for what seemed like weeks. Who knew the U.S. had a rainy season? No matter—she would jog with an umbrella.

 The 53-year-old Krishna had come here, to Woodside, Queens, to visit her daughter Anu, whom she hadn’t seen since Anu moved to the States twelve years ago. Krishna had been here for a couple of months now, and Anu and her husband, Shyam, had taken her on family outings around Manhattan and down to Washington, D.C. Krishna’s native Pokhara is a city of 200,000, but New York was a different story. Krishna spoke no English; her tongue refused to form those mushy R’s and meowing vowels. Even the street and building numbers had to be translated for her. The Nepali language has its own way of writing numbers, insidiously close to ours but not identical. The numeral 1 looks like 9, 4 like 8, 5 like 4. To help keep Krishna safe, Anu and Shyam had defined a kind of comfort zone for her. Roosevelt Avenue, shaded by the elevated track of the 7 train, formed its southern boundary, and Broadway the northern one. The house, on 62nd Street, represented the area’s westernmost point; the intersection of Roosevelt Avenue and Broadway (the two streets merge) its eastern one. The area spans less than twenty blocks, and as long as the 7-train tracks were in sight, Krishna could find her way home by following them. Anu had also outfitted her mother with an emergency kit: a cell phone with the home number preprogrammed, some cash, and a laminated card with Anu’s home address in English on top.

 The park with the jogging track sits on a green hill on Woodside Avenue at 54th Street, a fifteen-minute walk from Anu and Shyam’s house. There is basically one turn required to get there—a right on Roosevelt. But something—the early hour, the rain—disoriented Krishna. She followed 62nd Street toward Roosevelt Avenue, as intended, and that’s where she made her mistake. Instead of turning right, toward the park, she turned left. Believing she couldn’t get lost if she kept the train tracks in sight, Krishna marched on. When she arrived at the corner where Roosevelt meets Broadway, she recognized it as the eastern tip of the safety zone. If she turned left there, she could be home in ten minutes. But left was now right, and Krishna turned in the wrong direction, spinning out of the neighborhood.

 She was confused now. The avenue looked familiar, but only in the sense that it looked like every other avenue. The city was like a mountain range, cartoon-simple from a distance, indecipherably complex up close. After a bit of wandering, Krishna passed a Hindu temple, Satya Narayan Mandir on Woodside Avenue, where Anu had once taken her. Krishna was Buddhist, despite her name, but spoke Hindi well. There were people inside the temple who could have helped her, yet the sight of it only strengthened Krishna’s feeling that she was close to home and didn’t need help. She looked around, saw a distant bridge that resembled the elevated 7-train tracks, and set off for it.

 What Krishna thought was the train trestle was actually the BQE overpass. She crossed under it and walked alongside Queens Boulevard. She marveled at the garish colors of Pop Diner and was briefly startled by a lifelike, if green, deer statue in front of the nearby Queens Borough Elks Lodge. But all these new sights didn’t quite add up, and Krishna didn’t know what to do. She had left the house wearing American jogging clothes—later to be described on a missing flyer as a burgundy top, black velvet track pants, and white sneakers with blue and yellow stripes. She was also wearing a $1,000 gold chain around her neck, $4,000 worth of gold bracelets on her right arm, and a pair of bulky gold earrings (Nepalese women tend to wear their wealth). What she didn’t bother to bring was the preprogrammed cell phone or address card Anu had given her. Or cash, a credit card, or any I.D. It was past 8 a.m. now, and Krishna was gradually coming to terms with an undeniable set of facts. She was thousands of miles from home, unable to communicate with anyone, alone, without money, and hopelessly, utterly lost.

 


 

Krishna is a Gurkha, a member of a Nepalese people famed for its tireless trackers and fearless soldiers. The British had used Gurkha battalions since 1817, and still do. Even in the modern U.K., their regimental heraldry includes a fully functional kukri knife. She wasn’t scared, not yet anyway, so much as determined. She was faced with a task and set out to accomplish it: I’m going to find home.

 She wandered the stretch of Queens Boulevard for a time, poking around side streets with alien names like Jacobus and Ireland. Krishna still believed Anu’s home was just around the corner. In reality, she was now in Elmhurst and heading toward LeFrak City.

 Krishna knew the word home. She also knew help—Anu had taught it to her as part of her emergency-training boot camp. Somehow, from the depths of memory, a third word appeared: mistake. Perhaps these words could be fashioned into something useful. “Help, mistake, home.” No, even better: “Help, home, mistake.” This could work. She approached a friendly looking man with it, but he recoiled. Am I saying it right? “Help, home, mistake.” She tried it again, on a woman with a small child, but got the same reaction, plus a few unintelligible words over the shoulder as the woman speed-walked away, pushing her stroller. This was hopeless. Even if someone understood her, she wouldn’t be able to understand the response.

 At about 10 a.m., Krishna saw two girls in tracksuits and sneakers, walking purposefully in front of her down Queens Boulevard. She concluded they were going jogging in the same park she had been headed for. The scale of the city was still incomprehensible to her—she didn’t even ponder the idea that there could be other parks. So she followed the girls around the corner and down Grand Avenue, for a dozen blocks. When Krishna began to lose faith in the effort, a promising thatch of greenery appeared in front of her, and she hurried toward it. But it wasn’t a park. It was a Catholic cemetery. Shocked by the size of it, Krishna missed the moment when her accidental tour guides abruptly disappeared. Steeped in the supernatural lore in Nepal, she assumed the two girls were apparitions. Cemetery ghosts. She kept walking.

 Soon it was past noon. Her feet were beginning to hurt. Hunger made itself known. Having wandered for five hours, she was now nearly five miles away from home and more uncertain than ever of how to find her way back there.

 

Back in Woodside, Anu, who works as an au pair, had awakened around 8 a.m. By 9, she knew something was off—her mother should have been back from her jog. Another hour later, Anu called Shyam, who was at work in New Jersey. He took the rest of the day off and returned to Queens.

 Anu’s first thought was a robbery gone wrong. After all, Krishna was wearing all that jewelry. Anu had never been mugged herself but was convinced, from films, TV, and press, that this sort of thing happens all over the place and to everybody. “In New York,” she says, “you see this story every time you read the newspaper.” Shyam assumed the voice-of-calm role, but Anu was still worried. Even if there wasn’t a robbery, so what? Her mother, the mother she had brought all the way here, the mother who had, upon her arrival, essentially become a child—naïve, vulnerable, dependent on her—was gone.

 The Gurungs, like many Gurkhas, prefer to exhaust all other options before involving the police, but by 6:30 p.m. the couple had become concerned enough to call 911. Almost an hour later, when no one had showed up at the house, they went to the police themselves. The Gurungs’ house, it turns out, stands near the border of three precincts, and an hour or so was wasted on jurisdictional back-and-forth. When the family finally got to the right precinct, they were told the officers were waiting for them at the house. To Anu’s shock, the police began by conducting a full-blown search, looking under the bed and into the closets while a detective started by asking if she and her mother had had an argument recently. At 9 p.m., the police filed a missing persons report. They told Anu that they would begin calling hospitals and checking for a Nepalese Jane Doe matching Krishna’s description. They suggested the family do the same.

 The Gurungs brought with them from Nepal a deep belief in astrology and fortune-telling. On Friday night, a friend of Anu’s went to a local fortune-teller, who told her Krishna was “under water.” Anu began to cry. Shyam tried to convince her that “under water” might mean “in the rain”—it was, after all, still raining. But he, too, began to imagine the worst.

 


One of the 500 MISSING flyers Anu made for Krishna.  
(Photo: Hannah Whitaker/New York Magazine)

 Krishna, meanwhile, had spent most of the afternoon gradually wending her way south. At one point she wound up in Brooklyn. She then picked up on the same cue that had already betrayed her—the elevated train tracks. Although Krishna didn’t know it, she was now following the J line back toward Queens. She still assumed that walking under the trestle would eventually get her home.

 As darkness fell, around 8 p.m., Krishna found herself in East New York. She walked into the enormous bus depot at the intersection of Jamaica Avenue and Broadway and roamed among empty buses until someone shooed her away. Several more times she tried to approach people with “Help, home, mistake.” It didn’t do any good.

 Later, she wandered up a ramp and onto the Jackie Robinson Parkway. Cars whizzed by, dangerously fast. After another bit of walking, she came across a second cemetery. This one was bigger than her native village. It seemed bigger than Kathmandu, the capital. Its size, stretching toward the horizon, made the mind ache: a city of the dead nestled inside a city of the unresponsive living. She spent hours wandering in the dark, and all she saw were graves.

 Anu didn’t sleep that night. By the morning, she was convinced Krishna was dead. It was all her fault—dragging her mother to America, tossing her into this vast concrete maze. Shyam kept telling Anu that her mother would come home any minute now, but after 24 hours, that was getting harder for anyone to believe.

 A burst of hope came directly from Nepal. Krishna’s husband, Maita, spooked by, but mistrustful of, the American psychic’s prediction, went to a different astrologer in Pokhara. That one saw Krishna “in a park near the water.” This was vastly preferable to the “under water” vision. Maita called Anu and relayed the vision. The family went searching the East River waterfront.

 Krishna told them what she had seen— the city of the dead, the green deer, the ghosts in tracksuits.

 

Midway through the night, Krishna had found her way out of the cemetery. Led by the light of a distant McDonald’s billboard, she walked along the cemetery border, past darkened gas stations and body shops, until she came upon a 24-hour coffee shop. The shop was deserted except for a single middle-aged waitress whiling away the graveyard shift behind the counter. Krishna opened the door, triggering the chime, and sat down in the booth closest to the door. The waitress offered her a sandwich and a glass of water, but Krishna was too proud to accept food from a stranger. Couldn’t they tell from the gold? She was no beggar. She had a perfectly lovely home; she just couldn’t find it at the moment. After a moment of silent negotiation with herself, Krishna took the water.

 She felt her head grow heavy and dozed off, waking to a rude shove a couple of hours later. The waitress’s shift was over. The man who had come to relieve her yelled at her, probably for letting a vagrant in, and kicked out Krishna. Krishna slept a little more on a cemetery bench, woke with the sunrise, and decided to retrace her steps, orienting herself by the light from the east to walk north, the direction she believed would lead her home. A friend of the Gurungs’ would later report a sighting of her in Ridgewood. He saw her from afar and didn’t realize she was lost.

 By Saturday afternoon, Krishna had gotten herself back on Queens Boulevard. She looked for the green deer, but couldn’t find it, and hatched a new plan. Off in the distance, about four miles away, the Citigroup tower loomed, the tallest building in the borough. Krishna decided that the tower marked the city’s center or main square. So she marched to Long Island City, narrowly bypassing Woodside on the way. She’d been gone now for almost a day and a half.

 Just a few blocks north, the clan was pulling together to find one of its own. The call was put out to the Gurungs all over the United States. Uncles, aunts, and cousins were streaming in from Boston, Baltimore, Virginia, and South Carolina. The house on 62nd Street became a center of almost martial operations. Small teams trawled Woodside, Maspeth, LeFrak City, Hunters Point, Astoria (where a subset of the Nepalese community resides). Point persons were assigned—Anu, Shyam, Anu’s sister Babita and Shyam’s friend Pravakar. A rotating team of volunteers stayed at Anu and Shyam’s home, in case Krishna unexpectedly called or came back. Anu went to the corner store and used the copy machine to print out 500 missing-person flyers in English and Nepali. Each showed a photo of Krishna taken on the family trip to Washington, D.C., looking characteristically stoic, with the Capitol in the background.

 In Long Island City, Krishna was crushed to find out that the skyscraper she had been marching toward wasn’t the city’s focal point. A larger, impossibly larger city opened up behind it, across the river—with dozens, hundreds of skyscrapers filling the western horizon. Exhausted, she made her way to the river and began studying the waterfront. Later, Krishna couldn’t even explain why she thought going over to Manhattan was a good idea that afternoon. She was grasping for anything even remotely familiar; Shyam and Anu had taken her to Manhattan over the Queensboro Bridge, so she had a vague notion that they would look for her along the same route.

 She soon found a grime-covered bridge and crossed it, but the city on the other side was a bit weird. It was small, for one thing, and seemed to have only one street. One of the most notable structures was a huge parking garage. Krishna dutifully walked around the garage and, having wasted an hour or so, decided to return to Queens. She made her way back over the bridge, leaving behind what she had initially taken for Manhattan but what was, in fact, Roosevelt Island. The darkening sky portended another wet night on the streets. Exhausted, she began looking for a place to sleep.

 This is when the hallucinations came. Krishna began to hear the voices of her daughters, Anu and Babita. They were speaking from two different directions, Anu into Krishna’s left ear and Anu’s sister, Babita, into the right one—they were talking over each other. Mostly, they just repeated the word mom: “Ama.”

 With the daughterly din in her head, Krishna moved ahead. She found a fountain in a small waterfront park and drank. She found a public restroom in another park and cleaned herself up (accidentally walking into the men’s room first). She came upon Astoria Park, where Anu had taken her before, and once again felt a trace of hope that she could regain her compass. The voices kept going. Ama. Ama. Later, she’d say she heard Shyam’s voice too, paired with that of Anu’s, but she would just say that to be nice to her son-in-law.

 In the gathering darkness, Krishna left the waterfront and turned east, toward Ditmars-Steinway. Had the sun not set, she might have seen the flag of Nepal hung in the front yard of one house she passed: another missed shortcut home. Instead, she wound up at a power plant that sits on the northernmost tip of Astoria. It looked like the end of the world, a vast landscape of asphalt and silent machinery. Krishna settled on a concrete bench just outside the fence. She pulled a piece of cardboard she’d found under her and fell asleep sitting up, legs crossed, head bowed, her daughters’ calls growing quieter in her ears until they wafted away.

 Forty-eight hours had passed since Krishna had disappeared. At midnight on Sunday, Anu was on her 40th sleepless hour. Shyam was beginning to worry for his wife’s health. He didn’t know it was possible to cry nonstop for almost two days, that a human body had such a pool of tears to dispense. On Sunday morning in Pokhara, Maita went to a different astrologer for a second session, taking along Krishna’s picture for a more accurate reading. The astrologer studied the photo, concurred that Krishna was “in the park,” and added that she was closer than the Gurungs thought. The search party continued combing Queens.

 The birds awakened her. A flock had perched on a small tree next to the concrete bench, chirping like mad. It was 5:30 on Sunday morning, and the rain had passed. The cardboard under Krishna was wet and spongy. Her feet were swollen, and her sneakers cut into her feet.

 She got up and continued walking for six more hours. She saw a man hose down a car in his front yard and asked him for some water from the hose. She saw a guard’s booth at the entrance to a parking lot that said notice in blue and white, an inscription that looked to her like police; she accosted the man inside, mistaking him for an officer. When he didn’t respond, it only fortified Krishna’s newfound belief in the callousness of New Yorkers.

 She was now on the verge of losing consciousness. Even the hallucinations had taken leave of her. She just walked, putting all her concentration into the very process of moving forward while staying upright. The direction no longer mattered—it was all the same everywhere. She would never find home, never see Anu or Babita. She walked some more.

 “Are you okay?”

Did she just miraculously learn English? Is that what happens to people at the last flicker of sanity—total understanding? No, it wasn’t English. Or Nepali either. It was the other language she knew but didn’t think useful here—Hindi. The speaker was a taxi driver. He had pulled up behind her, stopped the car and was now hanging out of the window, concerned. Krishna doesn’t remember what he looked like. She does remember thinking, without a shadow of doubt, that he was a god. She told him so.

 “No, no, ma’am,” said the driver. “I am a man. Do you know where you live?”

 “Woodside” came to her. It wasn’t much, but it was enough. “Woodside,” she said, “Woodside. Woodside. Woodside.”

 The cabbie knew what she meant—the Nepalese neighborhood. It was easy to find. Every other house had a flag in front of it. He would have taken her directly to Anu’s home, but as soon as she saw some familiar landmarks—a Chinese fruit vendor and a Sports Authority sign—she asked the driver to stop the car and let her out. Then she walked the remaining few blocks home.

 Anu’s friend Aarati, manning the home front, heard someone open the door. A second later, she was frantically mashing buttons on her cell phone. It was noon on Sunday, 53 hours since Krishna’s first wrong turn. Anu, Shyam, and Aarati’s mother were methodically combing a local park one more time, on the astrologer’s advice. When Aarati’s call came, they ran to Shyam’s Nissan and sped home. Anu cried in the park, and she cried in the car, and she cried when she saw her mother for the first time in almost three days. Then she cried for a few hours more.

 When she woke up the next day in her own bed, Krishna told the family what she had seen. She told them about the city of the dead, the green deer, the ghosts in tracksuits.

 Krishna soon confided in her daughter that she’d like to go back to Nepal, and left for Pokhara six weeks later—well before her visa ran out. Against all odds, she had developed a mild but persistent claustrophobia. She spent most of her remaining New York nights sleepless, and would often slip outside in the dark. She’d drape a blanket over the top step of the porch and sit there, looking at the night sky and a Buddhist flag flapping on the lawn pole, her head thrumming with the maddening knowledge of the enormity that hid just beyond the corner.

Source:  http://nymag.com/news/features/59009/

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